We all go through periods of nothingness, of weightlessness, of uncertainty and of void. They’re the periods right after something ends and something new is about to begin – right after high school or university graduation, the months before a wedding, that hole in-between job or career switches, the time before a move to a new city, village or country, etc. The more changes we make in our lives, the more we stay in this uncertainty, in this living, breathing chaos. If you’re like me, you’re taking accountability for your own life – that is, you’re creating it. Building the lifestyle you want is often tied with trying out different options, choosing one and letting go of the other. In other words, constant change.
Change in itself is disorganized, much like chaos. What’s the difference though?
How we see and describe the meaning behind both words. “Change” is generally neutral, it could be positive or negative, but it denotes that something new is coming in place of something old. It’s a continuous exchange between the past and the future with a clear expected result. “Chaos”, on the other hand, is associated with too many things happening or just floating around. It’s usually viewed as a negative change with an unclear outcome.
I’d like to challenge you to rethink these definitions. As you saw, “chaos” is a type of change. The main differences between the two words are the attitude and clarity of outcome we assign them. There can be chaotic good, chaotic neutral and chaotic bad periods. It’s all in the eyes of the beholder. You decide what type of period this in-between time will be for you. Will it be one of growth, of surrender, of wonder and awe at how the world works when you have no agenda for it? Or will it be one of anxiety, of fears, of unnecessary constant action, and overthinking? Daily and even moment-to-moment decisions make up your view of this time.
Yeaaah, I know, that sounds exhausting. And while you’re in the midst of it, it is. However, when that uncertain and shaky period is over, you see the fruits of your decisions. “When nothing is certain, anything is possible” – I’ve been seeing this quote a lot recently but have no idea who said it. Whoever did, kudos to them! Small decisions accumulate and become habits, habits become attitudes, and attitudes become worldviews, which translate into our reality. It’s as simple as that. Sure, each of us has their own blueprint on how to navigate life (human design helped me soo much with figuring out mine), but it all comes down to deciding whether you’ll follow yourself or you’ll follow someone else’s thoughts, beliefs and expectations about and of you.
That’s how you sit in chaos and in change – you connect to yourself, review what you want to continue in your life and focus on it, while simultaneously letting go of everything that isn’t working or bringing you joy. When you feel like you’re losing your ground and/or your support system, you do the hardest thing imaginable: sit back and relax. Trust. It’s all working out in your favor. It truly is.
If you don’t believe me, think back to the last whacky period in your life. Remember how shitty it felt, how lost you thought you were, how people were withdrawing from you. How did you get out of it? Did you take action, that made you feel calm or you did things out of anxiety? Did the feeling of that decision continue even after things in your life calmed down? And even if you went against yourself and your gut feeling, didn’t that force you to face your idea of who you are and to adjust it? Which led to some pretty nice things happening?
All I’m saying is, in periods of chaos, uncertainty, and change, being aware of your daily decisions pays off tenfold. Chaos gives you the freedom to break free from everything past and build what you want – it supports you in that endeavour because when nothing is set in stone, you narrate what you want to come to you. When things are shifting is exactly when life is asking you to take the lead and open yourself to receiving what you want. Change is the universe’s way of asking you “What now?”. Take the opportunity to really figure out who you are, what you want, focus on that, and go for it. Sure, it takes bravery to do something out of the ordinary or out of the norm. But do you prefer being unhappy for a long time or being scared for a short while, only until you take the leap? Only until you trust and come to the knowing that if something’s in your head, it’s coming into your reality.
Sitting in chaos means taking a breath, making a decision, leaping, and following life to the highs of existential bliss you’re here for.
Enjoy the spectacle of how once you decide and relax, life organizes everything much better than whatever you imagined. Hope you’ll join me in the void 😊